Someone you know has lost a person they love, and you want to say something, but every sentence feels too small or too much. That is normal. A condolence card does not need beautiful words. It needs to be there, and to be honest.
Keep it short and sincere
Two or three sentences are enough. Say that you are sorry, say that you are thinking of them, and, if you can, name the person who died. Avoid explaining the loss or looking for meaning in it.
- “I was so sorry to hear about Anna. I am thinking of you.”
- “Wishing you strength in the coming days. We are here if you need anything.”
- “Anna was always so kind to everyone. We will miss her.”
What helps, and what does not
Mention a real memory if you have one: it shows that the person mattered. Offer something small and concrete, like a coffee or a walk, instead of “let me know if I can do anything”. Leave out “at least” sentences, such as “at least she is no longer in pain”, and do not compare the loss with your own.
Writing as a team or a group
When a colleague, a classmate or a neighbour has lost someone, a card from the whole group says: you are not alone. Everybody writes a few of their own words, so the card does not need one grand message. Keep the tone quiet; skip jokes and bright decorations, and choose a calm design.
- “Our thoughts are with you and your family.”
- “Take all the time you need. Your work can wait.”
- “Sending you a warm hug from all of us.”
When to send it
Send the card in the first days, or a few weeks later when the visitors have gone and it gets quiet. A message after a month or two often means the most.
Make one card together
With a condolence card on Emailkaarten.nl everybody adds a message with one link, without an account. The card can arrive on the day of the funeral or whenever you choose. Start a card.
Frequently asked questions about the condolence card
What does it cost to send a condolence card digitally?
Starting is free: up to 7 people, one photo each, the free designs and a small watermark. For € 4.95 per card you get 20 people, two photos each, all designs, the slideshow and a PDF; for € 7.50 unlimited people and three photos. You pay once per card, never a subscription.
How long does it take to make the card?
About two minutes for the organiser. Everybody else opens the link, types a message and adds a photo.
Do the people who write need an account?
No. They open the link and write. Only the person who makes the card can choose to have an account.
When does the card arrive?
On the day and time you choose, by e-mail. The day before, the organiser gets a preview.
Want to know more about e-cards? Read e-card: what it is and how to send one or how to make a digital card in five steps.
